500 Wedding Ideas - Why are brides afraid to step outside the box?

Why are brides afraid to step outside the box?

I see so many brides who seem to think they have to follow all this little rules with their weddings. Like your colors have to match the season your wedding will be in. When I come on here and ask questions or answer them a lot of brides give you thumbs down or ridicule your answer if it isn't traditional or in the "norm"? Why is that?

Public Comments

I stepped way outside the box. Problem is most people don;t realize what they think of as traditional really haven't been around for all that long. Our society and pampering has created a bunch of self centered bridezillas.
Most people follow tradition but not all of them do it out of fear. For some it is peer pressure or family pressure and they just want the day to be nice without making anyone mad. I am a fan of traditional and wacky weddings. There's room for everyone in this world and I don't see why you'd be getting thumbs down or ridicule for wanting to do something different!! : /
I have to agree! I hesitate even trying to help here at times because I get a ton of thumbs down for what did or didn't work for me! Its just MY opinion doesn't make it right or wrong
I do believe there are some rules that should be followed, mainly in the way of etiquette on how you should treat your guests. Other than that, the door is open to interpretation. There's things that we're doing for our wedding that people think is really cool and they've never heard of when we're just borrowing traditions from other weddings (such as forgoing the guest book and having a formal wedding certificate that all of our guests can sign; a take off from Quaker practices). Today is all about cookie cutter events. Have you looked at the bridal magazines? Every single event that was suppose to have been personalized to the bride and groom's style looked exactly the same; only the color scheme and location changed.
because the wedding is a traditional and cultural ritual. it's sort of a way of the society to legitimize the union of 2 people. therefore, conformity becomes a big thing. humans wouldn't get wedded if not for social reasons anyway. many brides dream of traditional weddings because that's their idea of a legitimate bride-hood. they've seen that on tv, the movies, they've heard that from their elders, friends, relatives, etc. societies have also associated meanings to the symbols used in the wedding so modifying them might offend the traditional meanings of the symbols. so the point is that the wedding itself is a ritual that promotes social integration and conformity. being imaginative and creative will surely be interesting. i myself prefer that. however, it will compromise some social traditions and the deviance will be attached with stigma which isn't a very cool thing to bear.
I think part of it is confidence. Confidence in themselves and their decisions. My sister got married when she was 20, before she had a lot of life experience (though her husband is pretty great and they're still together 9 years later) and I still remember talking about her needing a song for when they lit the unity candle. I asked her what it even was, and she explained it and told me, "that's just what you do". She hadn't been to a lot of weddings... she didn't know she could even go "outside the box" lol! Now, she has had so much fun helping me with my wedding and getting creative. She suggests things now that never occurred to her for her own wedding. But, I'm 31. By now, I know that tradition can be lovely, but creativity is excellent. :) I just think, (most) people only have one wedding. So it's their first time and they're still learning. :) Hopefully, they realize how much more they could do before all their decisions are made!! Have fun with it, ladies!!
because they don't like to think for themselves and they want to put on a show for their guests, wha t they're "expected" to do. i'm having a short park ceremony, nothing fancy, followed by a cookout/pool party in a backyard, burgers and potato salad and all. I don't need a fancy reception with 100 people I've never met. I want a party and to have fun celebrating mine and FH's love with my immediate family and closest friends. bring on the thumbs down!
There is no right or wrong when it comes to traditional vs. nontraditional types of weddings and things like colors. (I am wondering where people get the idea that there is some kind of color rule though!) As for the thumbs down, well that is supposed to be for bad/incorrect answers but some people do give thumbs down just because they have a different opinion...it happens to all of us. Try not to let it get to you.
They've been conditioned over the years to do things a certain way and told that if they do anything differently that they are dooming themselves for divorce and their family and friends will talk behind their backs and disown them. Most women are afraid to think for themselves. To them, thinking outside the box means a different color scheme and that's it. Pick up any wedding magazine or open any wedding website and you can see that plain as day. People say they want to be unique but when it comes down to it, they're too scared. Alot of the stuff that is considered traditional is incredibly new. Some people create their own ideas and tack on the word "traditional" to justify being rude to their guests, as an example. As for the thumbs down, it's a system that has been abused beyond all control. What many people fail to realize is that there is a huge difference between etiquette and tradition. There are countless suggestions in this section that are popular that are very inconveniencing toward guests, and thus violating etiquette because it makes people uncomfortable. Tradition on the other hand changes all the time and there's nothing wrong with that. Things that were traditional 50 yrs ago aren't traditional today and won't be traditional 50 yrs from now, no matter how much someone tries to fight it. But a person shouldn't be flamed or ridiculed for wanting to be non-traditional as long as they are still keeping their guests' comfort in check which should be the main priority. No one here will even be attending your wedding so in the end, their opinions don't matter. But whenever you post on an online forum, you have to be aware that people of all opinions will respond. If you aren't willing to accept that, you are best just discussing your plans with your family and friends.
I totally agree..ppl criticize me because im getting married in October, which is during the fall and my colors don't go with the season. It's your wedding and you get to choose what you want. I just ignore everybody else lol
I have no problem with brides who choose to step outside the box so to speak with their wedding style. I also don't have a problem with those who wish to keep their wedding a little more traditional. As for myself, I am a pretty non traditional person at times. However, my fiance and I are planning a somewhat traditional wedding only because we want our photographs to be timeless and classic.
If you don't want to be judged for stepping outside of the box, then don't judge others for wanting to be traditional. They may not be "afraid" but that's just their style. When you ask a question, you are asking for people's opinion, so take it as they give it. Both traditional and non-traditional brides are going to answer. As far as the thumbs down, I agree, that is rude. I only give them if the answers are mocking the question or are rude...just ignore it!